Posts Tagged 'Vancouver'

I’m all over the internet!

After so many years of blogging, I actually put my mad skills to use and did a review on Canadian Beauty, a blog founded by a Canadian that’s really for anyone to read. Check out my article here!
After that mess with the strawberries, I read that you can use them to whiten your teeth. WHY DIDN’T I KNOW THIS? I could have been mashing pounds of berries on my teeth for good use. I guess eating them is just as good. I don’t really understand how a strawberry can whiten teeth, so if anyone wants to enlighten me, feel free.
In completely different news, I finally paid for another year of flickr, which means I can now see me 1700 photos, or however the hell many there are on there! I really ought to get back into the habit of taking photos. I really enjoy it and I’m not too bad at it. I completely farked up on cherry blossom season though, as most of the blossoms are gone now. Hopefully I’ll get some good shoots in this summer though.
Also, my sister and niece are coming to Vancouver next week! YUSSSSSS! Should be a good time. I get to do all the cool Vancouver stuff like go to the aquarium and ride the aquabus. I’m sure a trip to Granville Island is also in order! I could probably eat all of Granville Island. God the food there is good. If you’re ever in Vancouver, do yourself a favor and eat a meal somewhere on Granville Island. Your tastebuds will thank you. And maybe you’ll be lucky enough to be attacked by one of the ENORMOUS seagulls we have out here too. Seriously, these things are mutants. They are the size of a pug. I think I saw one wearing a gold chain and smoking a cigarette! Don’t look them directly in the eyes either, they’ll stare you down while another seagull steals your wallet!

I cooked a turkey and survived.

I wish I had a photo to prove it, but I am a (mostly) vegetarian and I cooked a turkey for Steve, and it tasted NORMAL! This chick is very pleased.
I hope your Christmases were as nice and that you got a bunch of cool stuff. Personally, today is my favorite day, Boxing Day! SO MANY DEALS!!! I want to buy everything, EVERYWHERE. Oh yes, and for those of you not in the “know”, it’s basically just Black Friday for Canada.
Now that I am back indoors, I feel effing WASTED I am so tired.
Speaking of wasted, my co-workers and I went for drinks on Tuesday after work and they got me drunk off of one beer before I had to run to the chiropractor. Talk about RELAXED. At that point I could have fallen asleep on the chiro table. Or maybe ‘passed out’ might be a better term. Either way, it was wicked.
It’s snowing again in Vancouver. AGAIN. And it hardly EVER snows here! I almost feel down an outdoor staircase trying to get to a Starbucks, and the bannister was useless because it was covered in snow, too! This city only has 3 snow plows, that’s how little it actually snows!
I think on Christmas Eve I had to get dug out of the snow 3 times! WHAT. THE. TOOTS.
It’s so snowy out I can’t see much of anything out the window except this sort of grey-ish white wall of nothingness. This must be what it’s like to get suffocated with a pillowcase, but maybe less wet.

Spreading a little Christmas Cheer

Guys, I’ve been trying to make a post about christmas gifts that are cool, but these ongoing chiro appointments are interrupting my blogging flow. That, and I am armpit deep in making invoices at work. I can’t believe I do accounting all day. How did this happen?!

So I tried to pull my tiny tree out of our “den” slash CLOSET and it looks like we’ve actually LOST the stand for the tree. So now I’ve got to go try and find a tree, but we’re not allowed to have a real tree, which at this point would be a lot easier than buying a small fake one. Fuuuuuuuuck. I guess I’ll be heading over to the ‘ol Canadian Tire or Wal-Mart or something to try and find a tree. Funny enough, we used to have a 9′ tree or something in our first apartment (my mom gave it to us) and so I have a bevvy of ornaments for a huge tree….which look….interesting on a little tree.

Oh!  The Santa Claus Parade is this weekend!  Woo!  Actually, from what I remember from last year, there’s a lot of advertising floats for stuff like Coke and Cadbury or some shit. Why is there so much advertising in this parade? I thought parades were just about watching really slow vehicles pass by and freezing in the cold with loved ones? Though I do remember stuff being thrown into the crowd, so that’s good. They love throwing shit in parades in Vancouver. Like when I went to the Gay Pride Parade this summer with AJ and he got hit in the face with a pink fortune cookie. I believe we later recovered the cookie, but hell, these parades are DANGEROUS! Let’s get festive and put out a bunch of kids’ eyes!  I should just start throwing chopsticks into the crowd or something. No one can keep track of the people giving out stuff for free!

I hope I see crazy dancing lady there. She likes to stand in front of the Art Gallery with some kind of a hot mess of an outfit. Gold Cleopatra wig thing, big glasses, sometimes smoking a cigarette, skirt with pants underneath and possibly army boots. Anyway, she wears headphones and dances to the music she’s hearing and puts a wee little garbage can out in front of her so that people can give her change while she gives’er.  I think last weekend she started belting out jingle bells at Steve and I and we lost our shit. Amazing. She should be at every Christmas party in this city.

Mo money mo problems

Cars are such money pits, but damn if they don’t get you around a hell of a lot faster than walking.

 

Isn’t Canadian money so pretty?  I love it.  It’s like shopping with rainbows.  And then spending all your rainbow on your OLD CAR.

If there weren’t so many effing people in Vancouver I wouldn’t be paying such a ridiculous amount of money for the next year in insurance, but poo poo, I’m paying 1.5 times as much as I did in Calgary to drive.

On the bright side, I can now drive all over the place.  HEY EVERYWHERE, HERE I COME.

My Sunday in Pictures

I shall choke all the Customer Service Reps I Can Grab

I can’t remember how many customer service reps I’ve talked to within the last 3 hours, but I’d like them all to take a fork to the eye.  I think I’ve spent more time on hold than I’ve actually spent speaking to someone.  Now I’m feelin’ kind of stabby.

I’m gonna do my best to post once each weekday next month, even though I suppose I’m just a little early for NaPoBloMo in November.  I’ve been too sparse, and we all like to have a little bit to read at work, don’t we?

Today the government finally released the “National Do Not Call List” registration, and hot damn did I get right on that list.  I can’t stand telemarketers!  I couldn’t even stand calling people when I worked for charities!  Okay, charities aren’t included, but I’m pretty sure anyone who has had to do a job where you have to try and “sell” things to people, you just get abused on the phone all day.  Can we just go our separate ways?!  A divorce from solicitation phone calls?

 

Speaking of solicitation, I saw quite the pantless hooker last night…IN YALETOWN.  Come on now, in Yaletown they pay for fancy hookers, or “Escorts” as the *classier* of the John’s would call them.  Which, I think I saw one waiting for a dude the other day in the lobby.  Man, the sex workers are thriving with lubricants in Vancouver!  Anyhooker, the “lady of the night” that I saw, was wearing a leather jacket, cropped white top, and panties.  Did I forget pants?  NO!  THERE WEREN’T ANY!  And to top it off, she was workin’ it outside of a Staples Business Depot.  Niiiiiiiiiice.

The Top 10 Most Fabulous Moments of the Vancouver Pride Parade

There was a lot of nudity, but clearly I shouldn’t post it on here as you are likely reading this at work, so I give you the Top 10 PG Rated Moments, haha.  

 


And okay, just because this is my personal fave from the parade:

WELCOME, RANDOM BEAR!

“Hey Random Bear!  Lookin’ good!”

Awwww yeah.

By the Seawall…

Steve and I found a live starfish!  Unfortunately I was dressed maybe “not so well” in lovely little shoes that wouldn’t allow me to venture out and see it first hand.

The tide got really high last night and washed ashore the elusive “sea broccoli”, which you non-Vancouverites might just call “garbage”.  But I think we all see the treasure of broccoli here.  It doesn’t look like terribly old broccoli, either, so how the hell did it end up in the inlet???  Actually, truth be told I saw at least 3 tampon applicators washed ashore in all this crap within about 30 seconds, which doesn’t speak very well for the quality of water.  I just can’t figure out how all this shit gets into the inlet???

Here’s my little feets by some of the stuff that washed up onto the pathway on the seawall.  Notice I was wearing tights.  It started raining the MOMENT we stepped outside.  DAMNIT!  But you know what?  Whatever.  I rocked the shit out of those tights in the rain

Here’s Steve pointing out some more garbage washed ashore.  If you look in the background you can see how low the water level was by the afternoon, but overnight it was all the way up onto the seawall

Then I noticed the very rare “ocean moccasins” washed ashore.  What really freaks me out about these is HOW DID THE PAIR WASH ASHORE TOGETHER?!!

It’s snowing meds!

Ah, the doctor was actually much better this time.  So now after many weeks of headaches and overall spacey-ness, I am on Cyprolex.  At least, I think that’s how you spell it.  The doctor was nice enough to not plow me with a year’s worth of perscriptions so that I didn’t have to pay a dispensing fee, but damn, keeping your brain healthy is EXPENSIVE!!!
I also had a long talk with the pharmacist about going completely off Effexor, and onto this other stuff, and I’ve got a pretty good program in place now to get me off Effexor while going onto Cyprolex.  So, today on this new stuff I am feeling sort of the same as with Effexor, but in all reality it’s going to take a week for things to start taking effect.
Speaking of effects, it’s always my favourite thing to read off all the “possible side effects” when I get new medication.  My favourite from this new one is “black, tarry stools.”  That is so far beyond the safety zone of anal leakage I don’t even know what to do with myself.  Plus, wouldn’t it be bad enough to experience one of those, say, a tarry stool, let alone the combination of basically shitting asphalt!  Maybe I can pave someone’s driveway and make some extra cash.  *TURN YOUR SYMPTOMS INTO COLD HARD CASH!!!*
I also enjoy when the information packet says “if you experience unusually long-lasting erections, please consult a physician.”  I just want to walk into the pharmacy and explain that I’ve never had an erection before, but damn, this erection I got is lasting for hours!  Maybe I’ll put a banana in my pants, too.  Just for good measure.
Oh yes, and I also have a theory about Zelda’s little piddle party.  She’s done this once before, but I figured something out: she has only peed like that when Steve has slept on the couch.  Now, before you start thinking “ooooh, trouble in paradise!” I have to tell you that Steve is sick again, and was feeling like he was going to puke, and since puke is my ALL-TIME LEAST FAVOURITE THING, he was nice enough to just sleep on the couch so that if he barfed, he didn’t barf near me.  He had to do this a few months ago too, and I’ll be damned if Zelda didn’t pee right in the same spot.  Anyhow, from this, I concluded that Zelda thinks of Steve as her mate, and she gets pissed when he doesn’t come to bed because we all go to bed at the same time, so she thinks I have kicked Steve out of bed, gets mad at me, and pees on my side of the bed.  Eh, eh????  Yes, I think she’s that smart.  And that vindictive!  She is a smart little pooch, so I think she’s actually got a serious thought process around peeing in the same spot on the bed.
In other news, IT IS SNOWING IN VANCOUVER RIGHT NOW!  WTF?!  I move from Calgary to escape the snow, and it follows me!!!!

Number Spells in Words

I had a really bad meal at Cafe Crepe today. I ordered a meal that had hash browns and it tasted like:

I kid you not. Ask Steve, he can vouch for the hamster browns. I couldn’t even eat them. Not only that, but the waitress forgot two parts of our order and we didn’t get our food for about 35 minutes, meanwhile other people got theirs in 10. I’m usually pretty relaxed about stuff like that, but I mean forgetting all that? And she didn’t apologize for being late with the food, or forgetting anything, and nothing was taken off the price of the meal. Boo! This is probably the third time I’ve been there and it’s been shitty every time. WHY DO I NOT LEARN??

I got my new glasses today, and they are pretty bitchin’.  I none of the photos I’ve taken have been that good though, but I’ll upload once I get a good one.  I’m feelin’ pretty swanky in them, and oh my GOSH my vision was actually -1.00 since I had my eyes checked the last time.  No wonder I’ve gotten a lot of headaches!  When I walked down Robson today it was like I had never seen so many things in my life.  STREET LAMPS!  ROAD SIGNS!  HOBOS!  IT’S ALL SO BEAUTIFUL!!!


July 2020
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