Posts Tagged 'holidays'

Spreading a little Christmas Cheer

Guys, I’ve been trying to make a post about christmas gifts that are cool, but these ongoing chiro appointments are interrupting my blogging flow. That, and I am armpit deep in making invoices at work. I can’t believe I do accounting all day. How did this happen?!

So I tried to pull my tiny tree out of our “den” slash CLOSET and it looks like we’ve actually LOST the stand for the tree. So now I’ve got to go try and find a tree, but we’re not allowed to have a real tree, which at this point would be a lot easier than buying a small fake one. Fuuuuuuuuck. I guess I’ll be heading over to the ‘ol Canadian Tire or Wal-Mart or something to try and find a tree. Funny enough, we used to have a 9′ tree or something in our first apartment (my mom gave it to us) and so I have a bevvy of ornaments for a huge tree….which look….interesting on a little tree.

Oh!  The Santa Claus Parade is this weekend!  Woo!  Actually, from what I remember from last year, there’s a lot of advertising floats for stuff like Coke and Cadbury or some shit. Why is there so much advertising in this parade? I thought parades were just about watching really slow vehicles pass by and freezing in the cold with loved ones? Though I do remember stuff being thrown into the crowd, so that’s good. They love throwing shit in parades in Vancouver. Like when I went to the Gay Pride Parade this summer with AJ and he got hit in the face with a pink fortune cookie. I believe we later recovered the cookie, but hell, these parades are DANGEROUS! Let’s get festive and put out a bunch of kids’ eyes!  I should just start throwing chopsticks into the crowd or something. No one can keep track of the people giving out stuff for free!

I hope I see crazy dancing lady there. She likes to stand in front of the Art Gallery with some kind of a hot mess of an outfit. Gold Cleopatra wig thing, big glasses, sometimes smoking a cigarette, skirt with pants underneath and possibly army boots. Anyway, she wears headphones and dances to the music she’s hearing and puts a wee little garbage can out in front of her so that people can give her change while she gives’er.  I think last weekend she started belting out jingle bells at Steve and I and we lost our shit. Amazing. She should be at every Christmas party in this city.

Coffee and Cooking

After working for Starbucks for 3 years, and now having not worked for them for about 3 years, I can still say that I am addicted to caffeine. I get a headache each day if I don’t have some sort of coffee-based item in the morning.  Oh my poor brain.  I’ve had a few moments of, “why do I feel like shit today?  I am so TIRED.  Wait wait, I haven’t had any coffee!” and then all is well again. 

Oddly enough, when you do one of those herbal cleanses, they don’t make you go off caffeine. You’d think they would want you to clear out your caffeine as well, but maybe it’s the caffeine that keeps you from going nuts.  I can vouch for that, having done a cleanse while working at Starbucks.
I’ve probably just got Starbucks on the brain because I am looking at my white mocha.  My delicious, 500 calorie white mocha.  I’m pretty sure that’s a third of what I’m supposed to intake calorie-wise on a daily basis?  But basically I am having it as a breakfast substitute, so whatever.  Breakfast it is!
On another note, has anyone bought anything that they have immediately lost?  I bought some thigh high tights from H&M and I cannot find them for the life of me.  And I bought them THREE WEEKS AGO.  They are still in the sock packaging.  I bought them so that when I wear a dress to work this Fall and Winter, my legs don’t FALL OFF from the cold.  Such is the way of the building I work in.  Heating?  Pfft.  That’s for suckers.  I don’t know where the heat even comes from in this building?  Wait wait, there’s a radiator on the exact OPPOSITE side of the room, which would explain why no one over there is cold.  Alas, I am by myself on the other side of the room, administrating my way through the day.
And just to randomly change topic again, I hope everyone  had a delightful Thanksgiving in Canada, and I hope you had a nice Columbus Day in the States!  I’d like to take a moment and brag that I cooked my first piece of meat.  EVER.  A turkey leg.  It was probably one of the worst things I’ve ever had to do, since I don’t eat meat.  But I cooked the hell out of that leg, and apparently it was delicious.  I looked up about 4 references on cooking a turkey leg, and so I was pretty sure I had it down.  Steve is still alive, so that’s a good sign that it was cooked!  Yesterday Steve asked our neighbor, Anthony about cooking meat, just to make sure.  He said it was all good.  Oh yeah, I should explain who Anthony is.  He’s this guy:

And he hosts this show:

on the Food Network!  What a good neighbor to have when you are cooking things that you are clearly not qualified to cook!  And frankly, he and his girlfriend are the best looking neighbors that anyone could have.  
Anyway, I managed to pull off a little Thanksgiving meal for Steve and I, and I also bought little doggie peanut butter cups from  this place:
I gave them to the dogs when we had pumpkin pie.  I bought two for each dog, and put them on little plates for them to enjoy.  Winston was a bastard though and managed to steal one of Zelda’s while she was trying to wolf down the first one, so he got 3 instead of 2.  What a dick!  I even tried to pry the cup out of his mouth, but he held strong and just ran away like he was covered in butter!  His punishment came later when he spent a half hour trying to throw up.  He didn’t, but he was heaving for a good amount of time.  Nothing says Thanksgiving like having to hold an old towel under your dog while he heaves!

And now back to our regularly scheduled blogging…

Hello, friends!  I am back from Calgary, or as I like to call it, “everything is brown like a turd town!”

I’ll post about the randomness of the holidays soon, but I just wanted to say hello again to everyone, and yes indeed, I have many a story to tell you!

Oh, and I guess the people in the US don’t know what Boxing Day is, but it’s kind of the same as Black Friday, except it’s the day after Christmas, so you get up all early after Xmas to plow people down for good deals on winter stuff.  I got some mad deals, I gotta say!

I think the most important thing I learned while I was gone was just how much I love my dogs.  I mean, I knew I loved them a lot, but the bond I have with them made me absolutely ache for my puggies while I was away.  All I can say is, it’s good to be back!!!

Holy Sweet Volcano Mother!

It’s about as hot as the photo in the office today!  The heater in the building is broken and so I’m livin’ the island life over here at my desk with a fan on full blast while I die a slow death in the sweater I chose to wear this morning!

 It’s apparently “quite” cold outside today.  Apparently people in Vancouver think that two degrees celcius is cold.  Let me tell you: IT IS NOT COLD.  I am still wearing a fall jacket and I am toasty, meanwhile there are people walking around in winter boots and jackets and holding scarves over their mouths like the next ice age has arrived and it is going to kill us all THIS VERY SECOND.

You know what’s cold?  MINUS FOURTY!  And did you know that at -40, celcius and farenheit are the SAME?!  Think about how cold that is.  You want to die in weather like that.  That’s the kind of cold that puts hair on your chest–MAN OR WOMAN!

Anyhow, despite this amazingly temperate “cold spell”, people went out to the grand Santa Claus Parade, which is known to me as “IT’S GOING TO TAKE FOUR HOURS TO DRIVE TEN BLOCKS TIME!”  I was sitting in traffic for so long that my gas light came on and I was VERY close to being stranded.  I had to park just to conserve my morsels of gas.  FOUR HOURS!  It was mayhem!  I accidently ended up parking like a block from the parade, so Steve and I just watched the parade and made a fun thing about it.  It was pretty sweet, except for the floats that we ad floats.  Since when were there advertisement floats???  Like literally there was a big semi driving the parade route with the coca-cola logo on it.  BUY COKE OR YOUR FAMILY WILL SUFFER THIS CHRISTMAS!!!

 I guess I’ll be sufferin’ away while I drink delicious Pepsi this holiday season!

July 2020
262728293031 collective fashion consciousness.