I’m pretty sure this whole Cipralex thing has turned out to be a bad idea. Over the past two weeks I’ve noticed myself unable to concentrate more and more. It’s like I am floating farther and farther out into space. I’m headachy a lot now, which is something that happened on Effexor as well, so I guess that’s just par for the course when you’re dealing with medication for your noodle.
I don’t like that I am so lightheaded though. I can’t seem to do anything unless I have headphones on, or else there has to be VERY STILL SILENCE. That doesn’t really help when I have to answer the phone at work, and you know, work in an open loft office with 4 other people.
There’s got to be something out there that will help me though. I think it’s time to head back to the doctor. The last time I was there, the doc gave me three months of cipralex and said if it was bad, to come back. It’s been two months, more than enough time to see if this stuff will work for me, and I just feel so cloudy and I am making little mistakes at work that I am not happy about. I’m in a pretty okay mood for the most part, but I still feel anxious, and I can’t get my thoughts under control. Mind you, they aren’t as out of control as when I am unmedicated, but I can still tell that they are constantly interrupting my daily process.
I would be pretty damn happy at this point if I didn’t have to take any medication, as really, when you think about it, I am messing with my brain chemistry! I mean, it’s a good thing they have medication, but I wish I could feel okay, be able to think clearly, and be able to concentrate…is that too much to ask?!
Even as I sit here typing this, I feel like I am sitting inside a sleeping bag with a pillow on my head. Try to do work like that! Well, hopefully I’ll have good news by the end of the week, and a new perscription.