Archive for January 14th, 2008

Sighing Like a Furnace

I seem to write a lot when I am eating, which makes me want to tell you all about the delicious food I am eating.  Ready?  Go!

 I am enjoying a nice, warm bowl of french onion soup.  Is there much else that tastes better on a cold, wet day?  I doubt it.  Not to mention it makes my breath smell like an old farm.  Love it.

Isn’t it just the cheese though that really makes this soup?  You can pretty much put cheese on anything and I will eat it with a vengance.  Lasagna, pizza, nachos, a tire–you name it.  I once did a cleanse when I was working at Starbucks a few years ago and I wasn’t allowed to have any dairy.  I was NOT HAPPY.  I know now that I can never be vegan…unless I develop a thirst for bludgeoning people out of rage.  Wouldn’t that be kind of ironic?

Along the lines of keeping warm, I want to show you the absolute ugliest piece of knitwear I have ever seen.  It was in my knitting pattern-a-day calendar, and it’s called the “bikini mitten.”

What can I say, really?  I think this atrocity speaks for itself.  Now I mean, I am fairly new to knitting (having learned when I was 15, and then having not knit for a good nine years), but is the knitting world running out of ideas?  Clearly, someone is.  What purpose does this serve?  It’s not going to keep your hands warm, and it doesn’t look nice, so WHY DOES IT EXIST?  It’s like they had 364 good patterns and then they just needed that one last pattern, and someone got attacked by a rabid dog or something and thought, “hey, my mittens look like a little bikini now, that is so hot.”

I spit on you, bikini mitten. *spits*

 Now if I show you something THAT ugly, I have to show off something nice.  Check out my entrelac scarf!

Isn’t it bootiful?  It took me a good 20 tries (I kid you not) to actually get the beginning of this damn scarf right, but now I am on my merry little way, and it’s looking like it’s going to be a favourite, you know, when I finally get done.  I’m using this really nice Japanese yarn that I am BANANAS over, and it’s making the scarf look really interesting.  I love how it looks woven, but it’s actually just one, continuous piece of yarn.  I THINK I JUST BLEW YOUR MIND.

Anyhow, all this typing is stopping me from eating my soup!  I must finish the cheese!

K, bye!

January 2008
2728293031 collective fashion consciousness.