Archive for September 10th, 2007

On losing a limb

I like the way you people think.

That’s why I have yet another question for you. You people are my heroes.

I was sitting in a burrito shop yesterday on Robson with Steve, watching the parade of people that passed by, as we usually like to do. Generally we will see the odd hobo here and there, and the odd plastic surgery nightmare. It makes for good times.

Yesterday we were watching at the window when I see this indie chick and presumably her boyfriend? walk by. As people watching is a quick, highly skilled occupation, I am quick to look, and quick to look away.

But I stop myself.

Is that man’s arm around his lady?

Wait…that looks like a kid’s hand…

Wait…this girl has a BABY HAND.

Now, I know there are people out there who have one deformed hand, or both, and that’s not really what my post is about.

What I am wondering is, what would you do if you had one small, or deformed hand? Does anyone know someone who does?

I just wonder if the “tiny” hand is of any use? Can you grab stuff with it? Can you even reach your own mouth? This made me think that if I had a small hand, that I might consider lopping it right off, that is, if it was of no use.

Then again, I pose another question. Does it disturb you to see someone with a deformity like that? I hate to say it, but it kind of creeps me out. I am a totally accepting person, but the baby hand thing really gives me the shivers.

Wait, now that I think about it, there’s this kid that’s on “the scene” in Calgary who has a little baby hand I think…Steve, do you know the kid I’m talking about? He actually takes photos for his myspace page of his little hand displayed prominently in front of things like a display of apples. He always shakes hands with the little hand, too. I think the shock value that the guy gets from that is totally funny though. He knows it’s an odd thing to see a deformity like that, and he puts it RIGHT in your face.

Is it just easier to look at someone with no hand, rather than a little baby hand? Does the baby hand have the strength of a “regular” hand? What about when the hand comes straight out of the shoulder? Is that really functional??

And, yes, these are the things I think of on a Monday morning.

How about Britney on the VMAs?!

I waited all day to watch the “comeback.”

What I saw was a porky re-animated corpse try to half-ass it for some stripper money.

Not like I am a huge fan of Britney, but I mean, she used to lip-sync with style. I think I saw some pork rinds fall out of her panties…

and maybe one of her kids.

September 2007
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30 collective fashion consciousness.


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