Archive for May 16th, 2007

I’ve got a handful of recycled paper and a broken dream

So after earth day, I thought I ought to be better to mother earth.  In an attempt to do so, I switched my cleaning supplies as well as my puppy stain remover to eco-friendly versions, since those are two things I use a lot.

Then I thought, gee, why not use environmentally friendly TP?  It’s recycled paper (not TP paper, thank goodness), and so it’s better for the planet than the luxurious Charmin I am used to buying.

We finally used the last bit of the fancy TP, and this morning I sat down on the potty to the new TP.

Instead of a nice, soft handful of pooper paper, do you know what I got?  I got slapped with the scratchy, one-ply scrap paper pile that made me feel a little violated in my post-wipe routine.

“It makes me feel like I’m really getting clean!” said Steve joyously.

“BUT IT’S ONE PLY!!!”

I can’t use one ply!  You get that kind of crap in the theatre when you’re out, but home?!?!  Home is supposed to be where the really great stuff is.  I mean, I understand that I bought TP that was recycled, but isn’t there a way to help mother earth, and not remove the epidermis on my ass???

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A Bad Case of the Walkies – Day 3

After thinking about things, I decided that I would attempt to use a bribe to get the dogs to listen.  They’re pretty good without treats most of the time, but walkies is probably the thing they are the worst at, so I had to bring out the big guns for this.

I started by putting on their harnesses, which always gets them going insane.  I first just tried Winston, but Zelda wanted in on the action, so I put them both in their gear. Slowly but surely I was able to open our apartment door all the way into the hall without a big fuss.  They sat and stayed.  Well, Winston stayed…Zelda hasn’t learned stay really well yet, so she would scoot on her butt a few inches to be closer to me, but still remain in sit.  It’s sneaky, and it’s cute.

The real issue is the front door.  They just go INSANE when I get there.  What I’m really trying to do is to get them to sit while I open the door, not only for manners, but because it’s also safer this way too. 

After a half hour they were doing pretty well, so I let them walk out the door.

MISTAKE!!!

Winston did his usual HUGE tug and started barking the hell out himself at who knows what.  Well, back in the house he went.  You should have seen his face when he got put inside and Zelda didn’t!!  The horror of it all!

Zelda was being an excellent puppy, so I took her a few steps, and she was still okay.  We made it around the whole block!  What a trooper!

Winston was pretty upset though, as he snuggled me and sucked up profusely upon my return.

Tonight I am going to try to get Winston out the door without a battle royale!


May 2007
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