By the power of Grey Skull!

Today was pretty much awesome. I got to sleep in, which is always a delight. Sadly, Steve had to move some furniture at his mom’s place, so he didn’t get the pleasure of waking up to my glorious explosive mullet this morning. His loss!
When I woke up, I thought I’d watch Planet Earth on the Discovery Channel, because a little someone named OPRAH said that it would be on ALL DAY on Earth Day. I expected to see sweet animals like this:

I think I’m going to buy the BBC version on Tuesday when it comes out since OPRAH LIED TO ME.

After I dried my environmental tears, I waited for Steve to get back and we went to our pug meetup.
I wasn’t even there five minutes and the craziest thing happened! Meimei ran up to me and peed right on the crotch of my pants, and then ran off! Perhaps she was giving me what for, for when Winston came over to Amanda and Jerry’s with Zelda and us and Winston took a pee near their food bowls. Maybe she felt I needed to have a pee accident in my 20s. If only I spoke the language of the pug. All I know is that I spent the hour having lovely conversations with friends with a big ‘ol pee stain on my crotch. Basically it looked like I got a little too excited about the meetup! I love Meimei and Miko though, so it was okay. Sometimes dogs just need to take a leak on other peoples crotches. I’m cool with that.

Actually, speaking of peeing, I had the fortune to see a whacked-out hobo with his pants down to his knees, taking a huge dump at the front doors of a notoriously racist bar. Lucky for us, we were stopped at a red light, so not only did we see bare ass, AND poop come out of someone’s butt, but he also managed to shove his genitals out near his pooper to take a pee on his freshly deposited feces! Ahhh, you don’t see that kind of sweet action in the suburbs!

After that, Steve and I went to get tickets to Hot Fuzz.
Now before I tell you just how flipping amazing this movie is, I have a fart story.

I was standing in the chain bookstore by the movie theatre, looking at classic literature, when Steve angrily commented about how they didn’t carry “Slaughterhouse Five.” He stomped a bit to make a joke of it, and then farted quite possibly the loudest anus burp I have ever heard executed in public. It was only after he let the big one go, that he realized that he had blown a huge fart out in the middle of a busy bookstore. And this is why I love him.

Anyhow, Hot Fuzz was easily the best movie I’ve seen in 2007. It was 100%, grade A comedy and action.

My favorite line:
“I can’t remember a time when I didn’t want to be a police officer, except for the summer of 1979 when I wanted to be Kermit the frog.”

And you can pretty much tell why it was amazing.


11 Responses to “By the power of Grey Skull!”

  1. 1 Ronin_The_Pug April 23, 2007 at 4:55 am

    Hihihi!!! LMizzle, you always make my day! If I feel like all the problems of the world are on my shoulders (you know the feeling, I think) I just read your blog… And I laugh! That is a very good way to start my day! So thank you!

  2. 2 LMizzle April 23, 2007 at 5:15 am

    Haha, I do what I can.

  3. 3 Goodboy Norman Featherstone April 23, 2007 at 1:49 pm

    LOL! There is so much to say in response to this blog, but I’m laughing too hard to say it. Freakin’ hilarious – all of it!

  4. 4 Katy April 23, 2007 at 2:07 pm

    Oh god…I can barely control the laughter so I can type! LOL! This post gave me such mixed emotions, I don’t know where to start. The crotch-peeing: hilarious. The hobo-pooping: positively revolting. The loud-farting-in-bookstore: even more hilarious!

  5. 5 John April 23, 2007 at 7:21 pm

    I’m lost! Where’s He-Man!?!?!

  6. 6 LMizzle April 23, 2007 at 8:15 pm

    Ah, they use that line a bunch of times in the movie!

  7. 7 Pug Mommy April 23, 2007 at 8:57 pm

    Man, the hubbie and I were so looking forward to seeing that movie and it didn’t open in our lame ass town! Can you believe that? 22 screens – 3 of which are showing a movie 3 weeks old — and NO Hot Fuzz! What is wrong with this picture?

  8. 8 LMizzle April 23, 2007 at 10:08 pm

    that is a travesty beyond my wildest dreams. Maybe it’ll show up in a few weeks???

  9. 9 minus April 24, 2007 at 2:39 pm

    We’re so sorry. She’s never, never done that before. I have no idea what she was thinking. I never have any idea what she’s thinking so saying that is moot.

    Just read that the British version of Planet Earth is narrated by Sir Richard Effing Attenborough! that’s so rad it requires and exclamation point. Two even. Sir Richard Effing Attenborough!!

  10. 10 Ultra Toast Mosha God April 24, 2007 at 6:25 pm

    My favourite line was:

    “If you want to play at being a big city cop, go and hang around the model village”

  11. 11 Princess Pointful April 25, 2007 at 6:35 pm

    Pug pee, hobo poop, and Steve farts.
    Is there such thing as a greater earth day?

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April 2007
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2930 collective fashion consciousness.



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