Archive for August 21st, 2006

how to get lucky with a corpse

Well, I forgot my lunch today, so now I’m going to have to suffer it out at work until I can get home to eat. It’s been a pretty long weekend! On Friday night, I was laying on the floor with Winston enjoying many hours of CSI. Eventually an episode came on where it ended up being a crossover with CSI: Miami. I am not a fan of the Miami version, so I fell asleep. When I awoke, I heard Winston chewing on something in delight. I thought nothing of it… “it must be a flip flop of mine.” NOT A FLIP FLOP!!! I finally roused myself awake to find Winston chewing on my $800 glasses! NOOOOOOOOOO! I took them out of his mouth and examined the rims. Okay, the rims were okay. The lenses…not so much! He managed to almost eat right through the lenses! Those are some sharp puppy teeth! Who can be mad though, the little turd doesn’t know what Chanel is anyway. I am curious how he managed to pull them off my face while I was sleeping though…
Luckily, I got new lenses put in the next day, so all was well again.
In other animal news, Bella has taken to sleeping inside of my pillow. I don’t know why, and I haven’t been able to sneak a photo yet, but when I catch her, she just gives me a sad face and suckers me into letting her stay there. What an animal pushover I am!

I had a somewhat frightening encounter with a corpse last night! I ended up having to put away product for the emergency room last night, and I found an extra box of stuff on my travels. I went to go put it away in the code room, but a nurse yelled out to me as I walked into the Code Room. The Code Rooms are where they take life or death situations. Like, if someone cut off an arm, or is literally on the BRINK of passing away. Anyhow, I walk through and the nurse yells to me to be careful, and that I might not want to go into the room.
“Why not?”
“There’s a dead body in there.”
“Hmmm. I should be okay.”

So I walk in and there’s a HUGE curtain drawn and tied to a shelf so that you can’t see what’s behind it. Okay, I am not standing about a foot away from a corpse. I figure, nah, I’ll be okay, I took an elevator ride with one once! Then I start to think, no no, the curtain is drawn and tied, meaning they probably haven’t been put in a body bag. That also means that I could walk into looking at someone’s chest torn wide open with blood all over. Hmmmm, yep, that’s different than looking at a body bag.
So I think it over and I reach for the tab. I can’t do it. I remember that I will have to stand literally less than a foot from the body, and who knows who this is, how old they are, and what condition the body is in. I am a curtain away from looking death in the face. I feel guilty for doing my job suddenly. Who am I to mindlessly wander around a corpse as if it’s not human, I mean, this was a PERSON up until just moments ago. Who are they? Does their family know? How old were they? Did they have a good life. I can’t stand the thought of being in such an intimate setting with someone I don’t know, and I feel it wrong to open the curtain.
I give up. I can’t do it. I can’t look at death. For now, that’s just a little too real for me. It just wouldn’t be right.

I AM given the surprise of walking in on a surgeon sewing up a man who has cut himself (who knows how) from the edge of his lip to his ear. Like we’re talking someone slashed himself so badly that now they have a puppet mouth. OUCH! I can’t even imagine doing that! Have you ever cut your lip??? NOT GOOD. Not to mention that this isn’t a little cut either.

Crazy. I couldn’t imagine that I’d have the opportunity to see this any other time. I’m glad someone warned me about the body! That’s certainly not a surprise that you can take lightly!

August 2006
2728293031 collective fashion consciousness.