Archive for June 5th, 2006

I like to keep it real.

What in the world happened to Richard Simmons…

Dear Richard Simmons,

Where are you? I was watching tv the other day and thought about you. Last time I gave a good ponder to a washed-up celebrity, Queen Latifah actually became popular again. Perhaps if I wish hard enough, you will re-appear like a sweatin’ to the oldies fairy?

Dear Bella,

Why did you wake me up at 4:00am this morning? You know I have to get up at 5am for that shift! I plan to tire you out tonight with a strict regime of kitty play time so I can get some sleep!

Dear hairdresser,

I love you, and my hair! Yessssss!!!

Dear co-workers from my full-time job,

You people are the funniest women I’ve met! There’s nothing like being able to say that I rode a roller coaster with my boss!

Dear printer at my other job,

I want to smash you to bits. You fucking suck.

Dear *Double D,

You are pretty much the biggest douchebag I’ve ever met. Why did you re-appear into our lives today? You’re about as smart as my cat’s litter box, so don’t act like you’re my boss.

Dear Steve R,

Return my damn phone calls!

June 2006
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252627282930 collective fashion consciousness.