This became the most infamous of days on the whole trip.
It started calmly enough. We woke up as early as we could (11am) so we could go watch Canada play against Russia in the Olympics at Mike’s brother’s house. Well, it wasn’t so much all of us waking up as me waking up and hassling everyone to get their asses out of bed because we all wanted to see the game.
After prodding and poking Mike and Steve got up. I felt kind of icky because this was day 2 with no shower. I couldn’t keep my daily shower schedule because Mike didn’t want to let the neighbours know (they all share a bathroom) that he had guests. We left for Peter’s house slick with that special smell that only Vancouver has…
Peter was kind enough to make us a delicious breakfast as we watched Canada get spanked by the Russians in the hockey game. This was pretty much the WORST game I’ve ever seen. CANADA MEN’S TEAM, YOU SHOULD BE FLOGGED.
Anyhoo, after watching Peter smoke a joint and no one noticing he was driving, we were off to the aquarium!
First stop was a show featuring the large and in charge sea lion.
HUGE. Sea lions make this really sick noise that’s really just a call, but it sounds more like a butt that’s sick with the shits. I don’t know what the hell they’re saying, but anything that sounds like a turd can’t be good news…
Since there was a fantastical crowd of tourists, we decided to go check out the kitties of the sea: otters!
Man I fucking love otters. They just kept swimmin’ around, doing this underwater ballet that mesmerized all four of us for over an hour.
Swin little dudes, swim!
Anyhow, we watched with delight as the two otters began to wrestle and playfight. Suddenly, the otters developed the most extreme style of partially underwater wrestling any of us had seen. One would literally put the other in a choke hold and do a barrel roll at lightning speed! This lasted for at least 30 seconds at a time…we were a little worried about the losing otter.
“Man, that one otter is really beating the shit out of the other one!”
This actually became quite exciting to watch…until…
“Hey…what’s that pink thing?”
“THEY’RE DOIN’ IT!”
Apparently it is the sexy way of the otter to grab your lady from behind, put her in a choke hold, spin her over and over (half under water) until she’s too dizzy to fight back, and pound ‘dat ass until she can’t take no more! The best part was watching the people who were standing above the water line figure out that the otters were having sweet and heavy sex.
NOW SHOWING: The Vancouver Aquarium
One of my fave quotes from Mike’s brother (while still high): “Take a picture of this turtle! It’s smiling at me! Take a picture of it’s smile so I can draw it later!!!” (note that Peter is doing this while grabbing my arm and pushing me into the glass where the turtle is)
Anyhow, I have to keep entering a password if I want to keep posting pictures, and hell, I’ve been sitting here for 45 min, so I’ll add more later!
Keep checking though, next up in the evening shenannigans, cooking our own japanese dinner, nine pitchers of beer, and Steve barfing on himself!
But just to give you a sweet taste of the insanity…
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