My cloudy, cloudy noodle…

I’m pretty sure this whole Cipralex thing has turned out to be a bad idea. Over the past two weeks I’ve noticed myself unable to concentrate more and more. It’s like I am floating farther and farther out into space. I’m headachy a lot now, which is something that happened on Effexor as well, so I guess that’s just par for the course when you’re dealing with medication for your noodle.

I don’t like that I am so lightheaded though. I can’t seem to do anything unless I have headphones on, or else there has to be VERY STILL SILENCE. That doesn’t really help when I have to answer the phone at work, and you know, work in an open loft office with 4 other people.

There’s got to be something out there that will help me though. I think it’s time to head back to the doctor. The last time I was there, the doc gave me three months of cipralex and said if it was bad, to come back. It’s been two months, more than enough time to see if this stuff will work for me, and I just feel so cloudy and I am making little mistakes at work that I am not happy about. I’m in a pretty okay mood for the most part, but I still feel anxious, and I can’t get my thoughts under control. Mind you, they aren’t as out of control as when I am unmedicated, but I can still tell that they are constantly interrupting my daily process.

I would be pretty damn happy at this point if I didn’t have to take any medication, as really, when you think about it, I am messing with my brain chemistry! I mean, it’s a good thing they have medication, but I wish I could feel okay, be able to think clearly, and be able to concentrate…is that too much to ask?!

Even as I sit here typing this, I feel like I am sitting inside a sleeping bag with a pillow on my head. Try to do work like that! Well, hopefully I’ll have good news by the end of the week, and a new perscription.

Whoop, there it is

Yes, I know I haven’t posted in two weeks.  My apologies!  I suppose I’ve just been trying to figure out exactly what I want to write about here.  I went to see Heather Armstrong on Friday after work because she was in town (anyone read Dooce?), but sadly the restaurant where she was got pretty crowded with middle-aged blogger ladies, and I’d had a pretty tough week at work, so I just took a good look at her to make sure she was real, and went on my way.

Yes, she’s real.  So is John!  It was almost like looking at an old friend, but hi, I’ve never met them.  I thought about taking a photo of her, just to show I was there, but frankly, she’s a blogger, not Madonna, so I thought it would be a little strange to just snap a photo and leave.  Though I guess that was a disappointing end to my week, Steve took me over to see her on the aquabus, which was a big delight!

Last week was sort of hard.  I forgot to take my medication on two different days, which totally effs up my brain chemistry, and makes it REALLY hard to concentrate.  I felt like I was in a cloud, and just couldn’t remember anything important, which, you know, makes doing your job sort of difficult.  I also was very clumsy, which by the end of the week made me feel like I was going to cry.  But I didn’t!  So the medication must be working, right?  I am still having a LOT of trouble concentrating, which leads me to believe that I may not have found the right medication yet.  Sigh.

The pugs are good.  Though the dogs have taken up occasionally peeing on our bed when the door is left open even a CRACK.  Which makes me want to scream.  Why the bed?!  Why not on the floor at least?!  I ought to be saving for a not-so-peed-on mattress.  Or maybe a carpet steamer.  Anyone want to sent me one?!

Oh yeah!  It was Winston’s 2nd birthday on the 20th!  He’s the big 2!  I am hoping not so much the terrible 2s as the “I AM GOING TO CALM DOWN AND STOP PEEING ON THE BED” 2.  Or maybe the “I AM GOING TO STOP BARKING BECAUSE IT GIVES MOM HEADACHES” 2.  I mean, look at this face:

HOW CAN I BE MAD AT THIS FACE?!

But wait, where’s Zelda you ask?

RIGHT HERE, BEING TOTALLY CUTE.  And yes, I know she has crap on her nose in this photo, and no, I don’t know what it is.  Probably poop.  Because I am a good doggy cleaner.  And Zelda is a good poop eater.

Ooooh, also, I got a new tattoo!

I don’t know if you can tell, but that’s my arm.  I am just waiting to see my mother lose her shit when she sees it.  I am debating what she’s going to say.  Well, then again, she doesn’t know I have one yet, let alone three, so I guess we really WILL see what happens when I see her next month.  It could really go a few ways.  She is really into watching LA Ink, London Ink, and Miami Ink, so I think she *might* just be shocked for a moment and then be okay, or she might look something like this:

and then yell a lot.  BUT, I am an adult, so she can’t kick me out of the house, HA!  And really, it’s already done, and I love it, so MUAHAHAHA.  At least I’m not showing up like this:

Right, RIGHT?!

Then again, I am interested in getting more, so my mother may pass out at the mere sight of me.  One can dream, right?

Just a little something extra on this Friday…

I was laughing my ass of at this yesterday. I love it.

In our house, we tape things to you so you’ll remember

Steve forgot to throw out the TP roll.  Yes, he changed it.  Then he put the empty tube beside the toilet.  So I shamed him.  Can you tell how happy he was about it?  I certainly laughed for a good five minutes!

I’m gonna try and shape up with the posting.  It’s hard to believe how much less I post when I have a job that makes me do WORK!

Also?  Zelda now has taken up “air humping” by herself.  It’s hilarious and very disturbing.

Celebrity Dogs!

So true, Winston, so true.

I like that Zelda ended up as Oprah, and so did her big sister, Miko!