CTGGTMO: DAY 1

Bloggers of the world, I need your assistance in an important matter! In May the rent in my building is going up $200a month. Now this isn’t the big deal. The big deal is that my wonderful friend Dan is moving out from upstairs!!! (*single tear*) So sad. At this point he’s thinking of moving into an apartment building a few blocks away, leaving his other roommate still upstairs. Now this roommate I think initially wanted to move in with Dan into this new apartment, but is now somewhat on the fence.
This is where all of YOU come in.
I need to somehow get this dude to move out so that I can take the upstairs apartment!!! This is where I begin the “Campaign to get GLENN TO MOVE OUT” (CTGGTMO). Dan, you’re probably reading this thinking I am nuts, but hey, you live in that apartment and you know how good it is!
Why do I want this apartment?
1) Because it’s got 2 floors of space, big enough for the dogs to run around
2) More room means no more having to keep the dog litter box in the kitchen
3) THREE bedrooms for the same price Steve and I are paying for our ONE bedroom apartment (don’t even get me started on how stupid our landlord is)
4) TWO BALCONIES!
5) No more lawn care, or snow shoveling!

As you can see, I’d be INSANE not to want the upstairs apartment. A balcony off the fucking bedroom?! Excuse me while I die of jealousy of Dan. If we got to move upstairs we could add another couch to the living room.

THE BEST PART is that with THREE bedrooms, Steve and I each get another room to do whatever we want with! I could have an artsy-fartsy room to make shit in! OMFG.

Another reason to get this guy to move out is that frankly, I think he’s a bit of a douchebag. Sorry Dan. I love you. You’re an excellent specimen of dude, but I just can’t take Glenn.

So, I ask, how do I convince Glenn to move out with Dan? DAN HELP ME!!! I’ll bake you a cake! A CAKE OF DIAMONDS!

I don’t have any particularly bright ideas as I don’t generally talk to Glenn. Also, in my attempt to get him to move out I obviously don’t want any harm to come to Dan.

And no killing. That’s too messy.

Unleash your ideas!!!

I suggest you grab your ankles and prepare for impact!

You know what song I like that I am ashamed of? The theme from Snakes on a Plane. I’m listening to it right now. It makes me want to ride a motorcycle while wearing hot-pants, knee high boots, and a blonde wig. What’s up with that?! The trouble that would go with trying to ride a motorcycle in a blonde wig is just more than I want to get into…
Today Steve and I took the pugs to the second pug meetup of the month! Woo! I was telling a co-worker that I was going to the second pug meetup of the month on Friday and she asked, “Boy, you guys sure are a tight group, aren’t you?” with this really weird look! Pfft. I go because:
1) Winston and Zelda get to run around with 40 pugs for two hours
2) I get to run around with 40 pugs for two hours
3) Watching any pug scoot around the building is in my personal top ten of awesome things that happen in the world
4) I get to hang out with a bunch of awesome people who share the same delight in these dogs as I do!

If that’s wrong then I don’t want to be right!

Today Zelda hung out with Turtle, a new Calgary Pugster Pug:

Most of the time his tongue was hanging out of his mouth, which is also a great point about pugs. Sadly, he didn’t for this particular photo op.

Winston spent most of the meetup doing his best impersonation of a seal:

Isn’t he beautiful??? He looks like a sausage link with a head! You’d be surprised that since I switched his food that he’s lost 2 pounds! Winston, have you been working out? You look FANTASTIC! What’s that? You only weigh 20 pounds now?! Well it shows! My goodness!

*THIS JUST IN! IMPORTANT PICKLE UPDATE!*
A few hours ago, I bit into my SECOND pickle with a face from my magic Vlassic pickle jar! Hopefully this photo works for all of you who couldn’t see the glory of the previous magic pickle I ate. I’m publishing this in Firefox instead of Safari…

This pickle looks more worried than anything! Seriously, Steve hasn’t bit into one damn pickle with a face, and I keep biting into pickles that could bite back! WHAT IS GOING ON?! WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO TELL ME, OH MAGICAL PICKLES OF WONDER AND DELIGHT?! SPEAK TO ME! WRITE ME A MESSAGE IN GARLIC!
Also, because Kara got upset that I didn’t save the previous pickle and instead continued to eat the magic pickle in hopes of ingesting some magical powers of my own, I decided to save this pickle on a napkin in my kitchen. If it is a Jesus pickle, my thoughts were that it won’t start to rot; Just like that grilled-cheese sandwich that a woman made in the states that had the Virgin Mary’s face on it. I don’t think this is the case with my particular pickle (because it’s already shriveling) but I will update you on its condition tomorrow.

Pickles, why have you chosen me to spread your message?! WHY ARE YOU HERE?!

Only time will tell.

Ichi-Gatsu

That’s Japanese for January! Hoorayness!

I am learning. Slowly, but surely I have been studying my text all week. I’ve managed to retaint a fair amount of information on how sentences are put together in Japanese DESPITE my obvious stupidity over not always remembering the exact definitions for things like verbs and adjectives. I admit that I obviously somehow wanted to make my life harder when I was older by not listening in my Elementary school Language Arts classes. What was I thinking?! I am an adult and I can’t remember what a fucking verb is! This also makes it a lot harder for me to understand what the tits my Japanese textbook is talking about! How ridiculous is it that someone with an honors degree (haha, MRC, I’m still graduating with honors!!!) doesn’t remember the definition for verbs!
I made myself a study sheet though, so at least I don’t feel quite as frustrated while I read my text.

Also, I found a site that will change your name into Japanese! Look at mine!!!

I colored it up a little to pump up the awesome factor. Please note that in Japanese my name is pronounced “Rooren,” instead of its normal pronnunciation. I love it.